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How To Play The Field And Win

By Astrid Engels

I dont care what anyone says. There is absolutely nothing wrong with playing the field, and internet dating is no different. But there are certain tactics you can employ to make the whole process run smoothly, avoid hurt feelings and allow you to focus on the funthats the whole point, right?

Maintain a Calendar

You'd think this one would be obvious but I've actually witnessed what happens when a calendar isn't kept! Talk about embarrassing. My friend thought he was Mister Hot Stuff with dates lined up for the next three weeks. And then oops! He made plans with A, then agreed to go to a movie with B. You guessed it, same night! Let's just say there were two very ticked off ladies and his reputation took a nosedive.

No matter how keen your memory, dating excitement and all the emotions involved make it easy to forget the details. So keep a calendar (on an actual calendar, your cell phone or your PDA) and let it guide you.

Don't Lie

At the outset of this little chat, I said theres nothing wrong with playing the field. Let me now amend that to say this: theres nothing wrong with playing the field, as long as youre honest.

This is a crucial thing. Never mind what motivates you to date around (maybe you arent even looking for someone special). You never know when one of those not-so-special companions could turn into someone amazing. The quickest way to ruin any relationship, or prevent one from developing, is to establish yourself as a dishonest person.

Im not saying to broadcast your social schedule, but if youre seeing someone and they ask if youre dating anyone else, just be honest. Be clear and dont act guilty like youve dont something wrong. And on the bright side, your forthrightness might lead to a conversation about how the two of you are feeling about each other. Honesty begets honesty and then everyone wins.

Protect Yourself

Oftentimes dating more than one person at a time means you'll have more than one sex partner. The bottom line is this; protect yourself. You need to take responsibility not only for your own sexual health, but your partners' as well. You'll avoid some potentially awkward conversations and you'll sleep (nudge nudge) the better for it.

Learn when to say when

Playing the field is exciting! But dating a whole string of people, all at the same time, can also be distracting. So you need to learn when enough is enough. Maybe your career needs more attention, or your family. Or maybe you want to focus all your attention on just one of your new friends.

One more thing about honesty. You need to keep a close eye on your dates' feelings for you. You may not be looking for something serious, but that doesn't mean they aren't. If the starts in their eyes twinkle just a bit too brightly then you're not on the same page and you need to put the brakes on. Fun and games is one thing; a broken heart is quite another.

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